A few, albeit less than 13, reasons

I just completed watching the Netflix show/current phenomenon "13 reasons", and it definitely elicited some pretty raw and intense feelings. Here's the cliff notes back story to get the five or six of you actually reading this caught up, if need be. Show is based on a book, apparently a cult hit of a book, centering around two main characters, a girl and a boy. Classic tale already, right?  The girl, Hannah Baker kills herself, no spoiler alerts needed cause its laid out there from the start, and the boy, Clay Jensen, who is trying to come to grips with it all throughout. There are 13 episodes. One for each of the cassette tapes Hannah recorded prior to committing the tragic act. She recorded these tapes as part of a chronicle of sorts, detailing the "13 reasons" why she killed herself. And the premise is that the tapes are to be delivered from each person listed, in the correct order, to the next one on the list. In other words, each offender listens to each and every sordid tape, and then is charged with getting them to the next in line. And if the chain is broken, Hannah has appointed an overseer, a "keeper of her intentions" to go public with a complete set of the tapes. An interesting twist on a common teenaged, high school angst filled tale. Throw in a screen full of gorgeous teen actors and a warm and sunny location and you're pretty much brought up to speed.

Let me start with this. It's kind of an odd feeling watching something without wondering the final result. There's not an overlying question of "Is she going to do it?" here. We know she does it. I initially had a few reservations about the Hannah Baker character, but have had a change of heart. Allow me to flesh this out. Hannah's character is played by a very attractive actress from Australia or New Zealand? On a different tangent, were no American actresses qualified? Lol. I have a feeling there are 1 or 2 running around LA. But, back to scene. This young actress is the OPPOSITE of what I have/had in my mind as the stereotypical teenage girl on suicide watch. Hannah, regardless of the issues she's confronted with through the first few tapes, appears to the viewer as mostly liked by almost everyone she comes in contact with. There's an awkward photo passed around social media, and she shows up on some dreaded list as having the "best ass" in the junior class. Not exactly the stuff normally associated with the list of reasons one kills themselves. But....just maybe, this was calculated? Hannah doesn't wear plaid, or dark goth makeup, she doesn't listen to sad dirges and walk around stoned out of her mind. No, none of these stereotypes. Maybe, this just shows that ALL kids have issues, even those that society deems as the "cool kids". I know that when I was that age, I would've bet big money that the popular kids literally had next to no worries. But, probably, the producers wanted a show full of hot girls and guys so as to bring in the masses. Whatever the reason, I'm glad they did.

My very brief review of the show itself? It's pretty good. Once I was a mere 2 or 3 episodes in, the binge factor kicked in, as it does with the good programs these days, and I sprinted to the final. It's very well done and the "tapes", or episodes weave together very purposefully. All bases are covered, as all the required personas are accounted for. You have the pretty cheerleaders, the jocks-both the dumb ones as well as those trying to play basketball for Harvard. Then there's the nerdy photography kid, constantly getting pushed around and bullied himself, as well as the dark and mysterious foreign kid, in this case a gay Latino. And lastly, you have to have the obligatory kid who is "smack dab in the middle". He's not super popular, and he's also not super nerdy, he is supposed to represent us, the American viewer. Meet Clay Jensen. Without boring my 5 readers more, let me say that I liked the show. It is thought provoking, and as a parent of not one, but two 17 year olds, it served to scare the living hell right out of me.

It took me a bit of fluff to get here, but here is the main reason for this particular blog. "13 reasons" has touched off a bit of a firestorm within social media circles, as well as the actual circles of school officials and the so-called "experts" out there. Is this show a good thing? Do we want our kids watching it? And, here is the coup-de grace....Does this show "glamorize" suicide? I'm no expert, by any means, but I do have a fairly strong opinion. Glamorize? Hardly. Yes, the package may be a pretty one, complete with beautiful people and perfect clothes, but make no mistake about it, the directors did not try and hide the gruesome topic of suicide behind all this prettiness. In order to get the message to the masses, maybe they needed some prettiness. It's uncomfortable to watch, It's harsh and stark in its treatment of the topic. There were no winners depicted in the final few frames. No, they all lost. They all lost badly. And, healing aside, I left with the impression that the actors convinced me that the characters, all of them flawed beyond reproach, would live out their lives with the stain of this horror always with them. So, glamorous? Absolutely not. And, let me add this. I watched the whole think, as aforementioned, knowing what was going to happen. Even if I caught myself hoping that some way, some how, there'd be this dream sequence and Hannah really didn't kill herself. Nope. Again, spoiler alert, she is very dead at the end. I also fell into the trap of just assuming that the end would go something like this.... some sad music, a bunch of sad looking classmates, lots of tears and Kleenexes, and a quick shot of a gravesite.  I just assumed that there was no way they would show Hannah "doing it". Well, again, I was very, very wrong. It was graphic, and it was beyond disturbing. But, you know what? It damn well should be. The "package" of this show might have been glitzy, or glamorous with its pretty people, but the subject matter here is not and should not be. We're light years beyond the ABC after school specials. I've read accounts of parents not letting their kids watch this? I have to ask, why? With all due respect to every parent out there, we all can raise our kids the way we see fit. And, its certainly not egregious or abusive to try and shield your kid from watching a graphic series on suicide. I just think its dumb. Why wouldn't you want your kids to see the carnage? Suicide is a thing. A real, brutal, ugly and rending thing. Today's kids aren't like us. They aren't going to respond to some public service announcements, or to a grainy film that treats the subject like a sterile and distant thing. And, for the record, I don't agree with any notion that this series "glamorizes" suicide. Each and every character was effectively ruined, and they didn't try and mask it any differently. So, the choice is to let your kids watch this and then be there to ask and answer questions, or, to stick your head in the sand and think that by NOT allowing them(and news flash, if you forbid it, they absolutely will watch it. This is the year 2017, and they can and will find it, I assure you), that you are magically ensuring that they will never ever be "that kid" who ends his or her own life, well....I've got a unicorn to show you , and its not the one that Starbucks is mixing in with their coffee.