We Were Northwest

We were Northwest. We weren't Fox, Eureka, Lindbergh and no way in hell were we Parkway. We were Northwest House Springs, Mo. We weren't some private or "it" school, and that was just fine with us. After all, those who fled to those places had already done so. We were metro the middle of nowhere....close enough to the city to make ourselves believe we were St.Louisans and yet close enough to the farmland and the sticks to be lumped in with all the "hicks" according to all those who truly were St.Louisans. It's been a tad over 20 years ago, and yet as I sit here and reminisce about those four enchanting years, it could have been yesterday. I know that while I was there, I probably wouldn't have used such sappy language. High school can be and usually is a stark and sometimes abrasive crash course into the rigors and heartaches of life. But, many years later...all I can remember are the moments. The endearing moments. I'm sure that its' somewhat natural and common to revert to the "age of innocence" once one passes through middle age, or is on the cusp of that inevitable sensation of getting old, or shifting from one perceived stage to another one. Adult life turns out to be nothing like the fantasy we think it to be and suddenly, those four years of awkwardness and discovery dont seem so bad? In my case, in our case....it was far from bad. It was idyllic.
Parusing a rogue video that all of a sudden appeared out of thin air rekindled decade old feelings and I was suddenly awash with a combination of tears and goosebumps. I take it for granted that we have all of these simple conveniences that we just can't live without now? Cell phones, video cameras, computers. Back then, though....these were foriegn concepts, in many cases, concepts that weren't even around yet. So, to see images from a roving and roaming video camera, some twenty years later, is indeed something to see. It's the simplest of things....the color of the walls, the smiles and the facial expressions from ancient students, the lockers in the annex, the passing teacher or two....it was almost possible to close my eyes and smell the nachos and pizza wafting from the cafeteria. I was a junior again. A junior at Northwest. I watched this "simple" piece of history with the glazed eyes of a kid on Christmas eve. I was on the edge of my seat, fighting back the tears as I recognized this classroom, and that hallway. There was Mrs. Bagby, my old freshman english teacher....thank you Steve King for this most cherished and hallowed of gifts.

Armed with twenty plus years of so called "wisdom", I'm sure we all would do a bunch of things differently. Kenny Chesney has a poignant and heart wrenching song that uses this concept as its backdrop. In it, he croons that most certainly he would do a lot of things differently. We all would. I would have went to every athletic event possible and cheered lustily for our Lions. I would have joined every single club and group and committee in order to emerse even deeper into the depths of the experience that I only lightly touched. I would try and meet as many kids from every walk, every clique, every corner of our humble school and learn from them and to befriend them and to walk the halls with them. Damn the connotations and the stigmas. I am drunk with the desire to forge relationships with these ancient faces who are but ghosts now. Math club? Chess club? Too geeky back then you say? Sign me up. I would have actually tried out and played soccer because I know I could have, if only I wasnt afraid of failure. How much do we miss, how much do we really and truly miss because of fear of failure? We all have things we would like to go back and do, or in many cases, un-do. Unfortunately, that's not how life works. We live and learn. I'm about to rip off the great Anthony Michael Hall, and his iconic character in one of the most iconic movies from our wonderful decade...."The Breakfast Club". Can't you vividly recall that defining closing scene? Simple Minds is starting to jam and the club is walking out of detention together, but seperate. And, Anthony is reading his letter from the group aloud. I get chills every time! I"m paraphrasing but we were jocks and burnouts. We were geeks and nerds. We were preps and we were nobodies. We were all these things because society labled us as such. We labled ourselves as such. We weren't all friends. We were far from communal. We subscribed to the same high school cliques as every single high school in the entire world, but you know what? We were in a way all dreamers. And, we grew up together. We lived, we learned...together. We all had plans. We were on the cusp of the rest of our lives, together. And this world was vast and just begging to be conquered. I'm sure there were and are a few of us who did some ass kicking out there. But, the vast majority of us probably left the conquering to others. And, that's absolutely fine! That is how life works. But, what I wouldn't give to walk the halls of Northwest one more time and to feel that innate bravado. I'd love to walk the halls and dream about tomorrow.

Isn't it just about the time where we are supposed to sit around the dinner table and regale our kids with our legendary and inflated tales of just how magical things were when we were young and dumb? Didn't we roll our eyes when our very parents went on and on about the fifties and sixties? I for one, take up this gauntlet willingly and eagerly! We were Northwest. We were a big blue “N” on a hill above our football field. We were band geeks under the direction of Mr. O'rear. We were warblers under the eye and ear of Mr. Raspberry. We were Gary the guard. We wore tight rolled jeans and all too often we flipped up the collars of our Ralph Lauren Polos. Oh that little logo. We were tricked out muscle cars. We were under the tutelage of some incredible and mind sculpting teachers. I have always held thesein reverence: Mr. Murphy, Mrs. Boyle, Mr. Ewing and Mr. Cook, Mr. Cavalerro, Mrs. West....and I am confident that I'm leaving out some heavyweights. We were innocent....or not. We were full of school pride. We were the best of friends....some of mine being Shelly and Gene(sorry for leaving out so many?! I only have so many characters to type!). We were scholars like Angie and Vu. The boys all wanted to be Alex, and the girls all wanted to be Tonia, we were just kids in a nowhere school, in a nowhere county. We were Northwest. Its taken me some 20 years to realize that and to verbalize some pretty potent memories. We were Northwest. More importantly and more poignantly, we are Northwest